Camp was a disaster. Guess what they did to me. As we all know, my school life has not been all that great right? I know for a fact that, in my batch alone all of them dislike me. They all have their own reasons which I do not want to know. I refuse too. Because you don't get hurt if you dont know. So at camp, everything was going fine on the first day. I cooked for my team and i'm glad they all liked it. I was shocked myself when i found out that the food tasted good. It was awesome actually. Hehehe. All of my friends were stuffed. Thank god. I wonder what would happened to me if they all had stomach ache by the end of the night. They'll hate me more.
I got a bit sick. I hate bad headaches and I couldn't do much. One of the reason that i fail becoming a prefect. *sigh* Let's move on to the second day. Well, they practically interviewed each and everyone of us. Asking about our personal lives. So we had to answer it with obligation. Among the whole batch that went, i was the only one to say that i wanted to get married. At the age of twenty-one. All of them didnt want to get married. Hehehe. It was rather odd though. They had this thing where all of us had to close our eyes and imagine the scenario that was dictated by the teacher. We had to imagine and see what would we do if we were in that situation or dilemma. It goes like this, we were having a birthday party and we could only choose 3 friends to bring. So we all had to choose 3. All this three must come from the people who were in the camp. I didn't have anybody at camp. Wasn't close to any of them. So I couldn't choose. Then, they told us to choose only one among the three. Everyone made their choice. They told us to open our eyes and walk to the person that we've chose. I didn't stand up. Noone touched me. I didn't expect anything so i wasnt upset or anything. After that, the teachers told those people who didn't get touched to stand up. I proudly stood up and wasnt afraid of anything. What was there to be embarrassed about? They asked me how i felt. I just kept quiet. They assume i was upset. Then, everyone just stared at me. They asked me what was going on in my mind. They kept on bugging me abt that. At last, i told them. I let it all out. Came along my tears with it. I told them that i was afraid to get hurt by my friends. That's why i wanna leave things as it is. I cried a lot. Non stop. I needed my best friend farah. But she wasn't there for me. So i had to keep it to myself. It was really bad. Everyone had to stand up and shake hands with each other. And a hug. Everyone hugged each other. I hugged everyone and cried even more. Some of them were my close friends last time. I've missed them so much. I couldn't do anything though. It was by far the most depressing moments. Everyone told me how they felt towards me. Apparently, they all love me. They're just afraid to be close to me. It's definitely a stupid reason. Nini came to hug me. I cried more when that happened. **gosh** I wish we were all friends again. I'm too soft sometimes. I'm just happy that i've got my friends outside that can help me!! I love you all. My brothers, sisters, all of you!!!! Thanks for being there for me. Eventhough im such a pyscho. Hehehehe.
-dkm
