I feel less butterflies flying around in my stomach each day as you leave me hurting in one corner. I had more than millions of butterflies in my stomach everytime you see me. Now, it is so different. Everything is changing around me. Especially, you. You are the reason that I am still standing straight today. Why can't it be like old times? I wish I could turn back to those times where both you and I were happy being together.
I cannot face the pain anymore. The amount of pain that you have caused me is so damaging till it affects my nerves. I'm not sure of how many nerves left in me to stand the impatience that you put up. I cannot believe myself. I'm in denial of your attitude towards me now.
I don't understand why you are turning into this monster. This is not the person who I fell in love with. The person who I fell in love with, had a big heart with a lot of patience for everything. You were blessed with a beautiful soul. What happened to it? Where has it gone to? I will try my best to find for the person I love.
I love you, Izzat. It's hard for me to let go of you. There will come one day that I would have to give you up if you keep on acting the way you do. I know you are going through under a lot of pressure, but that does not give you the right to take your anger or frustration on me. I will go through all the stress and pressure with you. Tell me slowly, what is your problem? I will help with all I can. I will help you with all the informations I've gathered over the years I've been alive.
You may not realize the change in yourself. I don't blame you for that. People say I've changed for the better. I have to admit that, even I myself don't realize it. I'm glad though. As for you, you're changing for the worst. Izzat, I need to know what are your needs. So that, I could fulfill them. There are more things to be written. Right now, I can't think properly and I want to talk to you.
.....to be continued.....
-dkm
